Singles Appreciation Day

Over lunch today with co-workers, after going around the table telling each other our plans for Valentine's Day, it occurred to us in a flash of genius that it's not fair that all of the "attached" people in the world get a day to celebrate their unabashed co-dependence! Why not a day to celebrate independence? To celebrate the fact that some people DON'T get married in their early twenties* – for the promise of a lavish wedding and boatload of gifts?

*These people inevitably are single again in their mid twenties, and married for the second time at around age 29.

Anyway. This is what we decided:

International Singles Appreciation Day will be an annual event, celebrated on February 15th, this allowing the Valentine-aholics their one stupid commercialized day to celebrate, which leaves all the singletons to celebrate their fabulous singleness the remaining 364. (take THAT!)

Singles Appreciation Day celebrants must commit to celebrating with like-minded individuals - the joy that singlehood is.

Nobody tell Hallmark. We need not have cards. What would they say? "You're fabulous, and that's all", and, "Yay you for not needing a man".

We will buy all of the leftover Valentine's Day candy on sale.

The official flower of Singles Appreciation Day will be the Dandelion. They're everywhere, they grow and prosper wherever they are, and, they're edible. Just like singles.

I bet we'll get a sponsorship from Kraft. You know, the makers of that individually wrapped cheese like substance? Kraft Singles?

Singles Appreciation Day can be celebrated by anyone, so far as they support the cause.

Singles Appreciation Day celebrants will be militant about not tolerating Late Valentine's Day Celebrations. We don't care if you couldn't get a babysitter last night. You had your day. And it was yesterday.

Seriously. Tell all your friends.

Happy Singles Appreciation Day, everyone!

(and Happy Valentine's Day to J. xoxo)